One day this week I was scanning my Facebook timeline and scrolled over a video of Jada Pinkett with her mother and daughter. Intrigued by the caption on the original post I decided to give Jada and her girls a few minutes of my morning.
I'm so glad I did.
Lately in my quest to become more fulfilled and balanced I have been trying to figure out exactly what I need to do to feel more well rounded. How can I feel that I have given my best each day? Is it possible to not feel like something or someone didn't get enough of my attention?
Through lots of trial and error (and the use of a planner) I realized that on the days where I actually feel like I've checked off all my boxes are the days where I have purposely taken the time to pay attention to myself.
Whether it means going to the gym, taking the time to pamper myself or getting something done on my personal to-do list I found that I am more at peace when I have done something for me. I'm not as stressed and things do not seem to bother me as much when I am taking care of myself.
Doesn't this seem like an obvious observation? You can not give what you don't have. And even though I have known this to be true doing it has been a struggle. It's no one's fault but my own if I'm not making sure that I'm truly happy and feeling good.
Sometimes it's so hard to remember to make that time for myself. Then I'm reminded that I have to be an example to Savannah. I know she's watching me. I don't ever want her to think that as a woman your life should be spent only focusing on those around you (even if you love them immensely) and never focusing on yourself.
As a role model for her I want to be a woman who does it all without becoming undone. I think the only way to do that is to make sure I'm not cheating myself out of anything. I need to continue to pursue my own dreams and do things that I enjoy.
And I know it sounds strange but I handle things so much better when I feel like I'm getting it all done. Because I'm not carrying around so much resentment, frustration or anger I'm not easily unraveled when my baby cries for an hour (or more) non-stop. I don't feel like pulling my hair out when Savannah wakes up with an extra dose of sass.
I am unbothered. Completely.
So Jada's answer to her daughter's question resonated with me because I have found it to be true for myself. What do you think?
I saw this interview too. I love Jada, her mother and her oh so cute daughter!
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So do I. I liked her perspective on how to handle our different roles.
DeleteI agree completely! Growing up in SE Asia, I hear new mothers say how much they don't have time to take a shower, feed themselves or just about do anything. I still hear that now but when I had my child I made sure that I need to take care of myself: that was have a shower everyday and wash that hair of mine. It was the best happiness of the day for me. Yep, to be able to take care of others. So crucial. Thanks for sharing the video:)
ReplyDeleteI'm glad you enjoyed the video. I agree with you completely. Everyday I make time for the basics - a shower, eating and a workout. It's essential to being happy for me. :-)
DeleteI can't believe my first time seeing this interview was when you posted it. Jada spoke the truth. I am a much better wife and mother when I take care of me. I too feel like I need it all needs to be done in order to feel good and complete. I think that's normal.
ReplyDeleteI remember seeing this interview a while back, I agree with Jada, although I find it really hard personally to balance the taking care of me first BUT I do agree that you can't be fully good to your loved ones when you aren't in "sync" with yourself.
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